minikul week 36

158
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Toen ik de wachtkamer van de bloedafnamedienst binnenstapte, zag ik meteen: Hartstikke druk, want vlak na de vakantie. Al die wachtende ogen richtten zich als op bevel op mij, nieuwe binnenkomer. ‘Deur sluiten,’ riep eentje nog vóór ik de deur achter me dicht had kunnen trekken. ‘Eerst een nummertje trekken, anders kom je nooit aan de beurt,’riepen er twee tegelijkertijd, al voordat ik mijn handen naar het nummertrekapparaat kon uitstrekken. ‘Hier is nog plaats als je tenminste niet teveel plek inneemt,’nodigde een derde mij uit. ‘Dat wordt zeker een half uurtje wachten,’ kreeg ik vervolgens van een vierde te horen. Het werd me meteen duidelijk gemaakt: Dit waren doorgewinterde bloedprikklanten die van de hoed en de rand wisten. Het bleef daarna even stil, wachtkamerstil, zoals je ook vaak bij de dokter aantreft. Waarna het hele welkom- en instructie-ritueel zich herhaalde toen een nieuwe bloedprikklant het wachtlokaal betrad.

Mijn nummertje was 73, terwijl 51 pas aan de beurt was. ‘D’r is maar één prikdame, dat noemen ze klantenservice,’ mopperde de man die wat zuinigjes opschoof toen ik naast hem ging zitten. Ik op mijn beurt schikte weer wat in, toen de na mij gekomene een plaatsje zocht. Die keek nieuwsgierig rond. ‘Gezellige bedoening hier,’richtte hij zich ietwat spottend tot mij, als dichtstbijzijnd aanspreekpunt. ‘Babbeldebabbel, leuk hoor.’ Ik knikte. De rest van het wachtkamergezelschap reageerde niet want er kwamen nieuwe prikklanten binnen; zij hadden het druk met hun instructies.

In mijn knikje zag de na-mij-gekomene kennelijk bevestiging, dat ik aanspreekbaar was en niet enkel mijn aandacht op nieuwe binnenkomers richtte. ‘Waarom zit jij hier?,’ begon hij eerst wat voorzichtigjes. Ik mompelde wat binnensmonds-neutraal met ‘Ach, routine.’ Daar nam hij vooreerst genoegen mee, want hij drong niet verder aan. Integendeel, hij barstte los over zijn eigen ziektebeelden. Hart, nieren, jicht, kortademig, moeilijk kunnen plassen, zo’n beetje alle ouwe mannetjeskwalen passeerden de revue. ‘Dus zei de dokter dat ik maar eens grondig door de molen moest. En daarom zit ik hier nu. Maar wat mankeer jij dan precies?’

Toen kwam voor mij gelukkig weer een nieuwkomer binnen. ‘Deur sluiten en nummertje trekken. En hier is nog plaats, ik schuif wel wat op,’ riep ik nog voor alle anderen hun mond open deden.

Henk Hendriks

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